[ If he ever hears Ai claim to be low-maintenance ever again, it'll be too soon. What? It's been almost twenty years? Yeah, no, he still rests his case. He's not sure if this was a result of a wish not worded well enough... or just the limitations of the Holy Grail.
Regardless, he found himself here... now on an unbleached Earth as a human like a certain Grand Caster had done... well, there were a few notable details that differed the situation, notably that he was reborn here... and a few years before Ai was even born at that. Seriously, what the hell? Why is this so complicated!?
Well, he can at least be glad that his name is still Oberon, even after being reborn into a different world. He's not sure if that's the grail at work or just a happy coincidence, but it meant there wouldn't be too much confusion... even if he had to deal with the current impossibility that is finding Ai, let alone what state she's in.
Honestly, there was just way too much he didn't know... but even if B-Koma... whatever it was called, doesn't exist yet... it will eventually. So alas, Oberon was saddled with the first goal of... getting into the entertainment industry. The Japanese entertainment industry, specifically.
Well, it's a good thing he's good at working hard for long periods of time, all for the sake of leading up to one big goal.
He followed the Japanese idol sphere closely the whole while. He heard of B-Komachi practically the instant they had their debut, but as expected, there was no sign of Ai. She had mentioned that she was scouted later on, hadn't she? He really wasn't interested in them as a group, but because they would presumably have an eventual connection to Ai, he kept an eye on them anyway.
He was good at acting. He was once a Pretender, after all. That was his way into the entertainment sphere. Becoming a prodigious child actor was easy enough, building up his reputation and subtly manipulating others to get more opportunities... yes, while he was still a child, too. If anything it was easier because of that. Nobody expects this kind of thing from someone who, by all means, should still be learning the alphabet.
To reiterate... it was a lot of work to get where he is now, and boy did it suck! His fairy eyes may have been considerably dampened, but Oberon can see through human bullshit just as easily with or without, and the entertainment industry could get particularly ugly. Seriously, what made him want this in the first place... was Ai. What the hell is even the point of being reborn as a human if she's not there with him? She was the only thing that made the idea bearable! Appealing, even!
Still, he had moments of hope to push him forward. Ai's debut in B-Komachi finally arrived, and... well, at this point he had to face facts, she probably doesn't remember him. Things have followed what she told him of her life too well. Having the memories of yourself in your twenties would have to stir things up, but it hasn't. There was a chance, then, that those memories would only resurface upon something triggering it. Like meeting him, for example. He looks pretty much the same, after all... well, the same, barring being much younger. He's three whole years older than her, but that still made him a teenager at the time she had her debut.
So with all of that in mind... he had to keep his distance. Because if meeting him would cause her memories to surface, then they couldn't meet now... and for a very obvious reason: her children didn't exist yet.
Whoever she hooked up with... well, he doesn't like the idea of that, but it's for the greater good. Whoever she hooked up with would be hard to hook up with—and consequently, get knocked up by—if she meets and remembers the guy who she had a lot of sex with in her future twenties before it happens.
So he waited. Waited and heard of Ai's hiatus due to health concerns... and promptly let out a long, long groan.
He wants to be there with her. He wants to be with her, right now... a part of him considers if it would be fine now. If now that she's pregnant with her beloved children, it would be safe to find her. Sure, it would make the future different from what they know, but... he misses her.
...Not that it's possible. She didn't mention which hospital she went to while they were still together, it simply never came up. He knows it's out of the city, but that doesn't exactly narrow it down. Ai's wherabouts at that point were a tightly-kept secret that he would have a hard time finding.
So... more waiting. More acting. He's become something of a household name in the Japanese Entertainment sphere... and perhaps being foreign helped in grabbing attention as well.
Ai made her return to the spotlight at last. He watched her return interview and nearly spat out his own drink when she very nearly outed her own secret almost right away... but whatever, that's Ai for you. They can meet now, can't they...? It should be fine... right? ]
"Ah, you're here! We're so glad you decided to join us, Oberon-san!"
Please, the pleasure is all mine. Now, I believe I heard that an idol would be joining us...?
"Eh? How did you know?"
Oh, it's just a little something I heard on my way in. It's no problem, I've just never met one in-person before, so I got a little... interested? Yes, interested.
"Ah, I see! Well, it's as you say, she's..."
[ He exchanged pleasantries with the director as he usually does with others in this world. This is just a talk show, Ai's debut into taking on more acting roles and jobs having provided the perfect opportunity to secretly nudge some higher ups' attentions toward her. They requested her participation, she agreed, and now...
...He'll admit it's uncharacteristically impatient of him, but he just... can't help it. He blames it on her, really. Making him this needy for her. He swiftly and cleanly ends his conversation with the director and starts looking around to try and spot her... and yet having no luck. She must not be in the room yet... ]
[ The gods have a funny sense of humour, don't they?
Not that Ai Hoshino would know anything about that. Extraordinary as she is as a human she's still nothing more than that. If there's gods or anyone up there, they're definitely not paying any attention to her. Her luck, her misfortune and everything else that makes up her life is down to human hands and nothing more.
It's nice to imagine that someone might, though. That her wishes, selfish as they are, matter to anyone at all but herself. When she thinks about it too hard, it makes her chest ache in some odd mix of deja vu, a sort of longing nostalgia that has no direction or source. It surfaces at equally strange times, too, triggered by the most arbitrary things: a coat lined with fur at the neck in the window of a shop, the sight of moths crowding around a streetlamp at night. Cornflower blonde hair and pairings of red and blue in certain shades.
When she goes to Lalalie and meets that boy for the first time, it crests into something almost painful to endure - then wanes into curious disappointment. It isn't as though she's been looking for something but at the same time, she's nagged with the feeling that this still isn't it.
She goes again and makes her mistakes all the same, of course. It's the closest anyone like her will ever come to loving someone. When Aqua and Ruby are put into her arms for the first time, the ache crescendos, so lovely and all encompassing that she can hardly stand it and she thinks that maybe this was the thing she'd been looking for without even realising she'd been missing it.
(Maybe it's the Grail that has a sense of humour about these things. But of course, Ai wouldn't know anything about that.)
It's a day like any other when she kisses the twins goodbye and gets bundled into the car by Miyako. A spot on a talk show promoting her other projects - nothing special. There are other guests, of course, but celebrity encounters have long since lost their shine for her. It's a little surprising that she's appearing alongside a man - well, technically still a boy - but just as idols are girls well into their 20s, boys with pretty faces are men as soon as the industry can get away with calling them that. But from what she's heard of his reputation, he's tidy and neat in the same way B-Komachi is - no scandals, no romance mishaps - so maybe he's 'safe'.
As safe as anyone in this industry gets, anyway. ]
Good morning! [ She practically singsongs it as she pushes the door open, Miyako trailing behind her with the longsuffering expression of a woman accompanying her child to an extracurricular activity ] We didn't keep you waiting, did we?
[ He's in the middle of another conversation started against his will, where he smiles his usual smile and says whatever is best at the time. The similarities to what Ai had told him have never been lost on him, but it's not like their similarities were any surprise at this point. It was effective, and not unlike what he was already used to doing.
Yet despite being in the middle of a conversation... the instant that singsong voice of hers rings in his ears, his smile drops and his neck snaps to look in the direction of her voice faster than he's ever done before.
It's her. ]
...
"Um... sir, is everything alright?"
[ He's fixated. He can't look away. How long has it been since he got to lay his eyes on her in-person? He's seen her on TV, seen her through a screen, of course he has... but... ]
A-Ah... yeah...
[ It's not like he's alone. He can spot right away a good number of individuals in the room who found their eyes fixed on her as well... her natural charisma just as radiant as he remembers. Yet while most of them snap out of it, getting back to work or returning her greeting, he...
...he can't look away. It's like his brain stopped working and now he's just, staring slackjawed at her. ]
[ Ai doesn't even seem to notice - or if she does, she's polite enough to pretend otherwise. She chatters away to the staff, bright and gregarious, as she hands over her things to be stored, exchanges cheery words of recognition with a producer who's run into her once or twice before and introduces Miyako, who still looks a fair bit like she'd rather be elsewhere.
But it's Miyako who seems to notice him first. Maybe Ai's just being polite, or maybe the intensity of his gaze is something she's so used to by now it barely registers. But Miyako's eyes flit over to him and narrow in something between caution and annoyance. It's only then that Ai follows her gaze and looks at him properly for the first time.
It's not dramatic at all. No grand swell of emotions when their eyes meet. Something certainly tries - her heart surges, trembling and alive in a way that catches her by surprise, but with nothing to contextualize it, she has no idea what to make of the feeling. Without knowing why it's excitement and relief, the pace of her heart just feels like anxiety.
She doesn't look through him like a stranger, though. Somehow, it's worse than that. ]
So we're today's guests, huh? Heehee, it's pretty exciting getting to go on with a real actor.
[ She smiles, warm and polite, picture perfect and exactly the way an idol should greet a fan. It almost looks like the first smile she ever gave him - a surrender, a showing of the belly. She might do a better job of covering it here, but behind her eyes, there's still a trembling prey animal. ]
[ Oberon is... embarrassed to admit that his mind went fully blank. It must've been a creepy look, but for once, he wasn't aware of what his expression was like... so he's not sure. Creepy is most-likely, though.
He wishes he hadn't, though. Of all times to need his mind working, this is almost certainly one of them. ]
...Yeah, nice to meet—
[ Nice to... meet you...
His hand comes up in a practiced motion, like muscle memory, to take her hand... only to stop short.
Nice to meet you.
It's not like he hadn't considered the possibility. The possibility that her memories wouldn't return. That she would look at him... like...
N i c e t o m e e t y o u
He feels his face go pale. He can only hope his already-pale complexion hides it well enough that it goes unnoticed. ]
...Nice to meet you too, Ai-san.
[ He smiles. Smiles as if blood hasn't drained from his face as his frozen hand finds movement again and shakes hers. She's just the way he remembers her, he can see past her act just as well as he could before, and yet... ]
You'll have to forgive me, things have been rather hectic, you know? I didn't mean to stare. Please, just call me Oberon.
[ When he takes her hand, she's surprised twofold - firstly that it's a handshake at all... but he's from outside of Japan, right? America, or England or something like that? So it makes sense. The real surprise is how chilly his fingers are when they wrap around hers - maybe she's just a little overheated from the car ride here, but it catches her off guard all the same.
She looks at him with open curiosity - or maybe that she's observing some manner of curiosity, an interesting interruption to the routine she'd expected. But then just as quick, her expression shifts back into a smile again.
It's not fake. For Ai of B-Komachi, it's all perfectly natural.
But Hoshino Ai's smile isn't anywhere to be seen. ]
If it helps, I didn't even notice. Occupational hazard, you know? [ Even her cheeky smile isn't quite right. ] That's a cool name, though! It's from a play, isn't it?
[ His laugh, meanwhile, is as fake as can be. He's better than this, he's better at making it seem natural... and to others, it does seem natural.
But it's not. It's the most forced he's felt in a long time. It's always been effortless before, but this time... as he stands here with Ai's hand in his, her hand in his after all this time...
He can't help but be shaken to his very core. A sensation that makes him want to throw up, right then and there. ]
Mmhm, A Midsummer Night's Dream. You've heard of it, then?
Sort of. When I was at my acting classes, it was one of the plays they had us read.
[ Which is strange, when she thinks about it - Lalalie was a Japanese theater company. But they'd also been a dirt broke one at the time, too. Maybe they were just scraping the bottom of the barrel for whatever they could afford the rights to.
She'd only really skimmed it at the time, but the names had stuck in her head. For whatever reason. ]
I guess your parents knew you were gonna be an actor, huh?
[ From behind her, Miyako clears her throat. Their hands are still linked, after all - Ai only realizes a moment too late that they've been holding on for too long. It doesn't feel at all uncomfotable for her hand to be in his, but she slips it free anyway. ]
I suppose so! I guess you could say it was my destiny.
[ Said with a playful wink before he lets go of her hand as well, quickly hiding it in his pocket to hide how it's trembling.
He hates this. He hates every second of this. She's right there... she's right there... and yet he says nothing. Not like there's much he can say that doesn't sound... well, completely insane. She doesn't remember him. The Ai he knows and loves is hidden behind that thick mask of lies that she had when they first met...
Is that it, then? The woman who greedily wished for everything... for him, for her children, for her own happiness... just going to forget him, just like that? Then what even is the point? Start over...!?
...Is it his fault? Is this his curse finally catching up to him? Since becoming human, his words have become worthy of the truth... but they weren't back then. Is this the result? Was their love... just a dream? Thoughtlessly cast aside as but a single night's revelry?
Is this his punishment, then? For daring to grasp what can never be his? ]
Don't worry, it'll be easy. Just be yourself! If nothing else, I can promise to watch out for you! It's the least I can do for another actor, right?
[ ...Except it doesn't matter, does it?
That's right, it doesn't matter anymore... it never has. Whether Ai remembered him or not was only ever secondary. He promised to fulfill her wish, didn't he?
Someone is after her life. Someone is going to kill Hoshino Ai... and he can't allow that.
He has a near-endless number of reasons to be pissed... hell, he probably is under that calm expression, but that's fine. It is what it is.
[ She laughs - perfectly rehearsed, her mouth at just the right angles and her eyes crinkling just so. No catlike flash of teeth, no mischief. It's not proper for an idol, after all. ]
I appreciate it! I dunno if I can really call myself an actor yet, though. [ she wrinkles up her nose a little, self-depricating in a good natured sort of way. ] Especially not compared to someone who's been doing it their whole life!
[ And she'd though she had it rough starting in B-Komachi at twelve - this guy's been doing some kind of acting gig since the moment he could walk and talk, it seems. She can't imagine having that much passion for anything at such a tiny age.
Then again, Aqua and Ruby are both full to the brim with opinions on just about everything. So maybe she's the weirdo here. ]
I'll definitely do my best though. So don't worry about me letting you down!
[ Surround yourself in enough weirdos and eventually you yourself end up becoming the weirdo... ]
Oh, it's nothing. I just had some extra motivation from an early age, is all.
[ He wants to see it. He wants to see it so badly... her genuine smile, her catlike mischief... he wants to see Ai Hoshino so badly it hurts. Is that Ai lost to him, now? That thought hurts even more.
To think that he might've been brought here only to save her... truly, what a selfish woman for him to fall for... to think that the goalpost would be both moved and changed just as he reached it. He'll have to learn where she lives, keep tabs on her in case of any changes in events. She died just before a concert at the dome, didn't she? At least that narrows down when it will happen... ]
Oh, I know you won't. Let's just say... like recognizes like, is all.
[ His eyes peer into her, trying to see the woman he loves hidden deep within, even without his faerie eyes... but alas, even if he could see her, she still wouldn't remember him.
So with those admittedly ominous parting words, he smiles his perfect smile before turning away. ]
[ Her smile doesn't slip but it does dim a bit - tempered, maybe, now that she doesn't need to dazzle him. She endures his gaze without flinching but it's meaningless. She's not knowingly inviting him to see. And yet, there's still something there - something wry, and tired and real. The slightest gleam of Hoshino Ai peeking out from inside, like she always does.
Like recognises like, huh? Of course it does.
People who lie can smell it on each other like rot. ]
"Ai, your hair and makeup..."
Oh, right! [ She turns to Miyako. ] I have to go get all prettied up, huh? I'm coming.
[ With that, they take their leave - but Ai pauses at the door just for a second to look back at him. The cautious curiosity in her eyes is that of an animal surveying what it thinks is a trap. Somehow, it's worse than if she hadn't looked at all.
[ Oberon doesn't look back. He can't afford to, not when he knows how much it will hurt to do so. He leaves through another door, waving to one of the staff members and explaining that he needs to use the bathroom.
To his credit, that wasn't a lie. He does to go the bathroom... but only to slump against the wall in relative privacy. ]
Hah... hah...
[ He puts a hand to his forehead, clenching his fist in frustration as he does so. ]
Shit...
[ He knows what he has to do. He's going to do it, no matter what. But still... ]
[ As talk shows go, this one is entirely uneventful. In fact, it's pretty low key - Ai's used to variety spots where the energy is turned up to eleven, where everyone plays games and pranks and laughs until their sides are sore whether any of it's really funny or not. This is more low energy. It's engaging, sure, but they're just talking and that's about it. It's really just promotion for their projects and that's fine. It's just part of the grind.
The actor seems nice, too. Oberon, or something? She usually has a much harder time remembering names but this one's so unusual, it sticks in her brain.
There's a little time after the recording for everyone to mingle and wait on their rides and Ai's one of the people hanging around. Miyako, who definitely doesn't get paid enough, had the twins to take care of while Ai was busy so now she has to wait to be picked up. Like usual, nobody's bothering to try and talk to her and Ai's happy to keep to herself and wait.
But her eyes keep drifting up from her phone and, without her really realizing it, landing on that actor she'd just shared the stage with. Like recognises like, huh... ]
[ It's not like Oberon had made an effort to make the event an interesting one. He had just wanted to meet with her, that was all. The talk show itself was secondary to it all.
Her not remembering him... well, to call it a gut punch would be an understatement, but he forced his way through it anyway. It's his own fault, he's the one who set this up after all. He lacks the right to complain, at least outwardly.
If nothing else, he's resolved. He'll do whatever has to be done in order to grant Ai's wish, even now. He's deep in thought, even as he performs the bare minimum of engagement with everyone else here, smiling jovially as if nothing is wrong.
It's all controlled so perfectly... or at least, it should be. Nobody else has noticed how tired his eyes are. ]
[ Ah. Now that's a look she recognizes. How could she not when she sees it in the mirror so often? It's really not any of her business and if he's that exhausted (from just a talk show? huh) then he probably doesn't want to be pestered, especially not by her, but Ai finds herself drifting over to him anyway. It's not like either of them have anything better to do. ]
Talk shows take a lot out of you, huh? [ She flashes a weary, sympathetic smile. ] At least there's not an afterparty. Sometimes those are a little much!
[ There. It's just for a second, but something about the sympathetic slant to her smile is finally Ai Hoshino. ]
[ She's not wrong, he'd rather not be pestered at all, but this kind of thing is just a formality he's resigned himself to go through every time... but it's been a little rougher since, well...
...and speak of the devil and she will appear. Maybe it's because of how lost in thought he was, but he didn't notice her until she was right next to him, and... ]
Ah...
[ ...If only she realized how much that smile hurts him right now. That flash of the woman he loves, all in just a smile. ]
...Ahaha! Caught me, hm? Well, I wouldn't say the show was particularly tiring, but you're not wrong about afterparties.
[ She tilts her head. That curiosity in her eyes isn't quite as cautious, now. She's not quite as afraid of being bitten if she approaches anymore, it seems. ]
Really? You're looking a little worn out.
[ She keeps her voice low, just so no one else overhears. He wouldn't want her blabbing to everyone, obviously. ]
But I guess being an actor's just as exhausting as being an idol is... it's all pretty physical, huh?
[ He smiles again... or rather, he continues to smile, hiding the pained grimace his face wants to make, but he refuses to allow. ]
...Is that so? Maybe I have been pushing myself lately.
[ For most of his newfound life, actually... he's pushed himself constantly, all for her sake, before she could even speak. It's why it hurts so much to speak to her like this, and yet... he can't bring himself to walk away. ]
Oh? Being an idol is exhausting? Wow, what a surprising thing to hear from Ai herself.
[ He keeps his own voice similarly low, coupled with a wink. He wouldn't like her blabbing to everyone how tired he is, and she wouldn't like him blabbing to everyone about how exhausting being an idol is to her. Now they're even, aren't they? ]
Oh man, of course it is! Everything that goes into it takes a ton of hard work. What's that saying... I don't remember exactly, but it's something about how nothing that's worth doing is easy. But it makes it even better when you get it right.
[ Another laugh, a little warmer and a little more coy. ]
Not that I don't appreciate a little break now and then. If I couldn't catch a nice nap on my days off, I think I'd explode!
Hah... fair enough. I think I'm overdue for a few days off myself, now that you mention it...
[ He leans back against the wall, letting out a sigh. Nothing worth doing is easy, huh... well, she certainly didn't help in that regard, making a wish like this, but he can't say she's wrong. Even if he'd really like it if she was.
Still, does this count as being encouraged by her? Even though she doesn't even remember him? It's funny thing to think about. ]
...Hey, how's about one last question? Off the books, of course.
[ They've done nothing but answer questions today... what's one more, right? ]
[ There's a pause before she responds - a beat of her mulling it over, like she's trying to work out if this request is a trick question. It sounds like it should be.
But something in her heart feels oddly settled and at ease at the sight of his face. Whatever he wants to ask, she doesn't think it'll be a trick. ]
Hm. I guess it's fine.
[ And then, like the first peek of starlight as the sun sets - she grins. Catlike and mischievous, she puts a finger to her lips and winks. ]
Hah, of course. Answer however you like, or not at all. You can even lie, I won’t mind.
[ It’s still her. It’s undoubtedly her. Even though she’s not his Ai… she’s still Ai all the same. ]
Still, I wouldn’t worry, it’s a simple one. Say that you were given the opportunity to have any one wish granted, what would you wish for?
[ There’s no point to this… he knows there’s no point to asking such a question now. Hell, he doesn’t expect to get a real answer out of it either, but…
[ She stares at him in silence for a second. Her smile dims. Not in dismay, but a softening of the light. ]
... A wish, huh?
[ For some reason, the thought makes her throat go tight. It's been a long time since she felt it, but that ache of displaced nostalgia comes rushing back so suddenly that it's a little frightening. For a second, it feels like her heart is crying for her to take notice of something, that it's a risk of slipping between her fingers if she doesn't-
But then it fades. The ache lingers, softening her expression even more and even though she has a hundred and one blithe, thoughtless answers she could give...
What comes out is the truth. ]
I don't know for sure. Or I guess it's more like... there's not really any one thing I really want. But if I could have it granted... I think I'd just ask for happiness. Nothing wild or exciting - and I don't mean that I never want to be sad again. But... when I think about the thing I really want, I think a future where I'm happy with the people I care about most is it.
[ Sharp blue eyes meet hers, fully expecting something blithe like world peace or something like that. She has no reason to be honest with him, after all.
But she is. She IS honest with him… and he can’t help but smile. A real smile. It’d be nice if his real smile was a tad less on the creepy side, but… ]
Good… yes, good answer.
[ Somehow, some weight leaves his shoulders. Not completely, but… it’s definitely her. There was never any doubt, but… ]
I know it was a little strange to ask that out of the blue, but thank you for answering anyway.
[ His staged smile returns as he takes on the role of a stranger once more. ]
I hope to work with you again someday… preferably on something a little more interesting than a talk show, no?
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Regardless, he found himself here... now on an unbleached Earth as a human like a certain Grand Caster had done... well, there were a few notable details that differed the situation, notably that he was reborn here... and a few years before Ai was even born at that. Seriously, what the hell? Why is this so complicated!?
Well, he can at least be glad that his name is still Oberon, even after being reborn into a different world. He's not sure if that's the grail at work or just a happy coincidence, but it meant there wouldn't be too much confusion... even if he had to deal with the current impossibility that is finding Ai, let alone what state she's in.
Honestly, there was just way too much he didn't know... but even if B-Koma... whatever it was called, doesn't exist yet... it will eventually. So alas, Oberon was saddled with the first goal of... getting into the entertainment industry. The Japanese entertainment industry, specifically.
Well, it's a good thing he's good at working hard for long periods of time, all for the sake of leading up to one big goal.
He followed the Japanese idol sphere closely the whole while. He heard of B-Komachi practically the instant they had their debut, but as expected, there was no sign of Ai. She had mentioned that she was scouted later on, hadn't she? He really wasn't interested in them as a group, but because they would presumably have an eventual connection to Ai, he kept an eye on them anyway.
He was good at acting. He was once a Pretender, after all. That was his way into the entertainment sphere. Becoming a prodigious child actor was easy enough, building up his reputation and subtly manipulating others to get more opportunities... yes, while he was still a child, too. If anything it was easier because of that. Nobody expects this kind of thing from someone who, by all means, should still be learning the alphabet.
To reiterate... it was a lot of work to get where he is now, and boy did it suck! His fairy eyes may have been considerably dampened, but Oberon can see through human bullshit just as easily with or without, and the entertainment industry could get particularly ugly. Seriously, what made him want this in the first place... was Ai. What the hell is even the point of being reborn as a human if she's not there with him? She was the only thing that made the idea bearable! Appealing, even!
Still, he had moments of hope to push him forward. Ai's debut in B-Komachi finally arrived, and... well, at this point he had to face facts, she probably doesn't remember him. Things have followed what she told him of her life too well. Having the memories of yourself in your twenties would have to stir things up, but it hasn't. There was a chance, then, that those memories would only resurface upon something triggering it. Like meeting him, for example. He looks pretty much the same, after all... well, the same, barring being much younger. He's three whole years older than her, but that still made him a teenager at the time she had her debut.
So with all of that in mind... he had to keep his distance. Because if meeting him would cause her memories to surface, then they couldn't meet now... and for a very obvious reason: her children didn't exist yet.
Whoever she hooked up with... well, he doesn't like the idea of that, but it's for the greater good. Whoever she hooked up with would be hard to hook up with—and consequently, get knocked up by—if she meets and remembers the guy who she had a lot of sex with in her future twenties before it happens.
So he waited. Waited and heard of Ai's hiatus due to health concerns... and promptly let out a long, long groan.
He wants to be there with her. He wants to be with her, right now... a part of him considers if it would be fine now. If now that she's pregnant with her beloved children, it would be safe to find her. Sure, it would make the future different from what they know, but... he misses her.
...Not that it's possible. She didn't mention which hospital she went to while they were still together, it simply never came up. He knows it's out of the city, but that doesn't exactly narrow it down. Ai's wherabouts at that point were a tightly-kept secret that he would have a hard time finding.
So... more waiting. More acting. He's become something of a household name in the Japanese Entertainment sphere... and perhaps being foreign helped in grabbing attention as well.
Ai made her return to the spotlight at last. He watched her return interview and nearly spat out his own drink when she very nearly outed her own secret almost right away... but whatever, that's Ai for you. They can meet now, can't they...? It should be fine... right? ]
"Ah, you're here! We're so glad you decided to join us, Oberon-san!"
Please, the pleasure is all mine. Now, I believe I heard that an idol would be joining us...?
"Eh? How did you know?"
Oh, it's just a little something I heard on my way in. It's no problem, I've just never met one in-person before, so I got a little... interested? Yes, interested.
"Ah, I see! Well, it's as you say, she's..."
[ He exchanged pleasantries with the director as he usually does with others in this world. This is just a talk show, Ai's debut into taking on more acting roles and jobs having provided the perfect opportunity to secretly nudge some higher ups' attentions toward her. They requested her participation, she agreed, and now...
...He'll admit it's uncharacteristically impatient of him, but he just... can't help it. He blames it on her, really. Making him this needy for her. He swiftly and cleanly ends his conversation with the director and starts looking around to try and spot her... and yet having no luck. She must not be in the room yet... ]
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Not that Ai Hoshino would know anything about that. Extraordinary as she is as a human she's still nothing more than that. If there's gods or anyone up there, they're definitely not paying any attention to her. Her luck, her misfortune and everything else that makes up her life is down to human hands and nothing more.
It's nice to imagine that someone might, though. That her wishes, selfish as they are, matter to anyone at all but herself. When she thinks about it too hard, it makes her chest ache in some odd mix of deja vu, a sort of longing nostalgia that has no direction or source. It surfaces at equally strange times, too, triggered by the most arbitrary things: a coat lined with fur at the neck in the window of a shop, the sight of moths crowding around a streetlamp at night. Cornflower blonde hair and pairings of red and blue in certain shades.
When she goes to Lalalie and meets that boy for the first time, it crests into something almost painful to endure - then wanes into curious disappointment. It isn't as though she's been looking for something but at the same time, she's nagged with the feeling that this still isn't it.
She goes again and makes her mistakes all the same, of course. It's the closest anyone like her will ever come to loving someone. When Aqua and Ruby are put into her arms for the first time, the ache crescendos, so lovely and all encompassing that she can hardly stand it and she thinks that maybe this was the thing she'd been looking for without even realising she'd been missing it.
(Maybe it's the Grail that has a sense of humour about these things. But of course, Ai wouldn't know anything about that.)
It's a day like any other when she kisses the twins goodbye and gets bundled into the car by Miyako. A spot on a talk show promoting her other projects - nothing special. There are other guests, of course, but celebrity encounters have long since lost their shine for her. It's a little surprising that she's appearing alongside a man - well, technically still a boy - but just as idols are girls well into their 20s, boys with pretty faces are men as soon as the industry can get away with calling them that. But from what she's heard of his reputation, he's tidy and neat in the same way B-Komachi is - no scandals, no romance mishaps - so maybe he's 'safe'.
As safe as anyone in this industry gets, anyway. ]
Good morning! [ She practically singsongs it as she pushes the door open, Miyako trailing behind her with the longsuffering expression of a woman accompanying her child to an extracurricular activity ] We didn't keep you waiting, did we?
[ If only she knew... ]
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Yet despite being in the middle of a conversation... the instant that singsong voice of hers rings in his ears, his smile drops and his neck snaps to look in the direction of her voice faster than he's ever done before.
It's her. ]
...
"Um... sir, is everything alright?"
[ He's fixated. He can't look away. How long has it been since he got to lay his eyes on her in-person? He's seen her on TV, seen her through a screen, of course he has... but... ]
A-Ah... yeah...
[ It's not like he's alone. He can spot right away a good number of individuals in the room who found their eyes fixed on her as well... her natural charisma just as radiant as he remembers. Yet while most of them snap out of it, getting back to work or returning her greeting, he...
...he can't look away. It's like his brain stopped working and now he's just, staring slackjawed at her. ]
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But it's Miyako who seems to notice him first. Maybe Ai's just being polite, or maybe the intensity of his gaze is something she's so used to by now it barely registers. But Miyako's eyes flit over to him and narrow in something between caution and annoyance. It's only then that Ai follows her gaze and looks at him properly for the first time.
It's not dramatic at all. No grand swell of emotions when their eyes meet. Something certainly tries - her heart surges, trembling and alive in a way that catches her by surprise, but with nothing to contextualize it, she has no idea what to make of the feeling. Without knowing why it's excitement and relief, the pace of her heart just feels like anxiety.
She doesn't look through him like a stranger, though. Somehow, it's worse than that. ]
So we're today's guests, huh? Heehee, it's pretty exciting getting to go on with a real actor.
[ She smiles, warm and polite, picture perfect and exactly the way an idol should greet a fan. It almost looks like the first smile she ever gave him - a surrender, a showing of the belly. She might do a better job of covering it here, but behind her eyes, there's still a trembling prey animal. ]
Nice to meet you.
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He wishes he hadn't, though. Of all times to need his mind working, this is almost certainly one of them. ]
...Yeah, nice to meet—
[ Nice to... meet you...
His hand comes up in a practiced motion, like muscle memory, to take her hand... only to stop short.
Nice to meet you.
It's not like he hadn't considered the possibility. The possibility that her memories wouldn't return. That she would look at him... like...
N i c e t o m e e t y o u
He feels his face go pale. He can only hope his already-pale complexion hides it well enough that it goes unnoticed. ]
...Nice to meet you too, Ai-san.
[ He smiles. Smiles as if blood hasn't drained from his face as his frozen hand finds movement again and shakes hers. She's just the way he remembers her, he can see past her act just as well as he could before, and yet... ]
You'll have to forgive me, things have been rather hectic, you know? I didn't mean to stare. Please, just call me Oberon.
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She looks at him with open curiosity - or maybe that she's observing some manner of curiosity, an interesting interruption to the routine she'd expected. But then just as quick, her expression shifts back into a smile again.
It's not fake. For Ai of B-Komachi, it's all perfectly natural.
But Hoshino Ai's smile isn't anywhere to be seen. ]
If it helps, I didn't even notice. Occupational hazard, you know? [ Even her cheeky smile isn't quite right. ] That's a cool name, though! It's from a play, isn't it?
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[ His laugh, meanwhile, is as fake as can be. He's better than this, he's better at making it seem natural... and to others, it does seem natural.
But it's not. It's the most forced he's felt in a long time. It's always been effortless before, but this time... as he stands here with Ai's hand in his, her hand in his after all this time...
He can't help but be shaken to his very core. A sensation that makes him want to throw up, right then and there. ]
Mmhm, A Midsummer Night's Dream. You've heard of it, then?
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[ Which is strange, when she thinks about it - Lalalie was a Japanese theater company. But they'd also been a dirt broke one at the time, too. Maybe they were just scraping the bottom of the barrel for whatever they could afford the rights to.
She'd only really skimmed it at the time, but the names had stuck in her head. For whatever reason. ]
I guess your parents knew you were gonna be an actor, huh?
[ From behind her, Miyako clears her throat. Their hands are still linked, after all - Ai only realizes a moment too late that they've been holding on for too long. It doesn't feel at all uncomfotable for her hand to be in his, but she slips it free anyway. ]
Well... let's do our best today, yeah?
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[ Said with a playful wink before he lets go of her hand as well, quickly hiding it in his pocket to hide how it's trembling.
He hates this. He hates every second of this. She's right there... she's right there... and yet he says nothing. Not like there's much he can say that doesn't sound... well, completely insane. She doesn't remember him. The Ai he knows and loves is hidden behind that thick mask of lies that she had when they first met...
Is that it, then? The woman who greedily wished for everything... for him, for her children, for her own happiness... just going to forget him, just like that? Then what even is the point? Start over...!?
...Is it his fault? Is this his curse finally catching up to him? Since becoming human, his words have become worthy of the truth... but they weren't back then. Is this the result? Was their love... just a dream? Thoughtlessly cast aside as but a single night's revelry?
Is this his punishment, then? For daring to grasp what can never be his? ]
Don't worry, it'll be easy. Just be yourself! If nothing else, I can promise to watch out for you! It's the least I can do for another actor, right?
[ ...Except it doesn't matter, does it?
That's right, it doesn't matter anymore... it never has. Whether Ai remembered him or not was only ever secondary. He promised to fulfill her wish, didn't he?
Someone is after her life. Someone is going to kill Hoshino Ai... and he can't allow that.
He has a near-endless number of reasons to be pissed... hell, he probably is under that calm expression, but that's fine. It is what it is.
She doesn't have to know. She just has to live. ]
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I appreciate it! I dunno if I can really call myself an actor yet, though. [ she wrinkles up her nose a little, self-depricating in a good natured sort of way. ] Especially not compared to someone who's been doing it their whole life!
[ And she'd though she had it rough starting in B-Komachi at twelve - this guy's been doing some kind of acting gig since the moment he could walk and talk, it seems. She can't imagine having that much passion for anything at such a tiny age.
Then again, Aqua and Ruby are both full to the brim with opinions on just about everything. So maybe she's the weirdo here. ]
I'll definitely do my best though. So don't worry about me letting you down!
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Oh, it's nothing. I just had some extra motivation from an early age, is all.
[ He wants to see it. He wants to see it so badly... her genuine smile, her catlike mischief... he wants to see Ai Hoshino so badly it hurts. Is that Ai lost to him, now? That thought hurts even more.
To think that he might've been brought here only to save her... truly, what a selfish woman for him to fall for... to think that the goalpost would be both moved and changed just as he reached it. He'll have to learn where she lives, keep tabs on her in case of any changes in events. She died just before a concert at the dome, didn't she? At least that narrows down when it will happen... ]
Oh, I know you won't. Let's just say... like recognizes like, is all.
[ His eyes peer into her, trying to see the woman he loves hidden deep within, even without his faerie eyes... but alas, even if he could see her, she still wouldn't remember him.
So with those admittedly ominous parting words, he smiles his perfect smile before turning away. ]
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Like recognises like, huh? Of course it does.
People who lie can smell it on each other like rot. ]
"Ai, your hair and makeup..."
Oh, right! [ She turns to Miyako. ] I have to go get all prettied up, huh? I'm coming.
[ With that, they take their leave - but Ai pauses at the door just for a second to look back at him. The cautious curiosity in her eyes is that of an animal surveying what it thinks is a trap. Somehow, it's worse than if she hadn't looked at all.
Then she's gone. ]
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To his credit, that wasn't a lie. He does to go the bathroom... but only to slump against the wall in relative privacy. ]
Hah... hah...
[ He puts a hand to his forehead, clenching his fist in frustration as he does so. ]
Shit...
[ He knows what he has to do. He's going to do it, no matter what. But still... ]
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The actor seems nice, too. Oberon, or something? She usually has a much harder time remembering names but this one's so unusual, it sticks in her brain.
There's a little time after the recording for everyone to mingle and wait on their rides and Ai's one of the people hanging around. Miyako, who definitely doesn't get paid enough, had the twins to take care of while Ai was busy so now she has to wait to be picked up. Like usual, nobody's bothering to try and talk to her and Ai's happy to keep to herself and wait.
But her eyes keep drifting up from her phone and, without her really realizing it, landing on that actor she'd just shared the stage with. Like recognises like, huh... ]
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Her not remembering him... well, to call it a gut punch would be an understatement, but he forced his way through it anyway. It's his own fault, he's the one who set this up after all. He lacks the right to complain, at least outwardly.
If nothing else, he's resolved. He'll do whatever has to be done in order to grant Ai's wish, even now. He's deep in thought, even as he performs the bare minimum of engagement with everyone else here, smiling jovially as if nothing is wrong.
It's all controlled so perfectly... or at least, it should be. Nobody else has noticed how tired his eyes are. ]
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Talk shows take a lot out of you, huh? [ She flashes a weary, sympathetic smile. ] At least there's not an afterparty. Sometimes those are a little much!
[ There. It's just for a second, but something about the sympathetic slant to her smile is finally Ai Hoshino. ]
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...and speak of the devil and she will appear. Maybe it's because of how lost in thought he was, but he didn't notice her until she was right next to him, and... ]
Ah...
[ ...If only she realized how much that smile hurts him right now. That flash of the woman he loves, all in just a smile. ]
...Ahaha! Caught me, hm? Well, I wouldn't say the show was particularly tiring, but you're not wrong about afterparties.
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Really? You're looking a little worn out.
[ She keeps her voice low, just so no one else overhears. He wouldn't want her blabbing to everyone, obviously. ]
But I guess being an actor's just as exhausting as being an idol is... it's all pretty physical, huh?
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...Is that so? Maybe I have been pushing myself lately.
[ For most of his newfound life, actually... he's pushed himself constantly, all for her sake, before she could even speak. It's why it hurts so much to speak to her like this, and yet... he can't bring himself to walk away. ]
Oh? Being an idol is exhausting? Wow, what a surprising thing to hear from Ai herself.
[ He keeps his own voice similarly low, coupled with a wink. He wouldn't like her blabbing to everyone how tired he is, and she wouldn't like him blabbing to everyone about how exhausting being an idol is to her. Now they're even, aren't they? ]
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Oh man, of course it is! Everything that goes into it takes a ton of hard work. What's that saying... I don't remember exactly, but it's something about how nothing that's worth doing is easy. But it makes it even better when you get it right.
[ Another laugh, a little warmer and a little more coy. ]
Not that I don't appreciate a little break now and then. If I couldn't catch a nice nap on my days off, I think I'd explode!
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Hah... fair enough. I think I'm overdue for a few days off myself, now that you mention it...
[ He leans back against the wall, letting out a sigh. Nothing worth doing is easy, huh... well, she certainly didn't help in that regard, making a wish like this, but he can't say she's wrong. Even if he'd really like it if she was.
Still, does this count as being encouraged by her? Even though she doesn't even remember him? It's funny thing to think about. ]
...Hey, how's about one last question? Off the books, of course.
[ They've done nothing but answer questions today... what's one more, right? ]
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But something in her heart feels oddly settled and at ease at the sight of his face. Whatever he wants to ask, she doesn't think it'll be a trick. ]
Hm. I guess it's fine.
[ And then, like the first peek of starlight as the sun sets - she grins. Catlike and mischievous, she puts a finger to her lips and winks. ]
No promises on if I'll answer, though.
[ But somehow, she thinks she will. ]
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[ It’s still her. It’s undoubtedly her. Even though she’s not his Ai… she’s still Ai all the same. ]
Still, I wouldn’t worry, it’s a simple one. Say that you were given the opportunity to have any one wish granted, what would you wish for?
[ There’s no point to this… he knows there’s no point to asking such a question now. Hell, he doesn’t expect to get a real answer out of it either, but…
He can’t help but ask anyway. ]
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... A wish, huh?
[ For some reason, the thought makes her throat go tight. It's been a long time since she felt it, but that ache of displaced nostalgia comes rushing back so suddenly that it's a little frightening. For a second, it feels like her heart is crying for her to take notice of something, that it's a risk of slipping between her fingers if she doesn't-
But then it fades. The ache lingers, softening her expression even more and even though she has a hundred and one blithe, thoughtless answers she could give...
What comes out is the truth. ]
I don't know for sure. Or I guess it's more like... there's not really any one thing I really want. But if I could have it granted... I think I'd just ask for happiness. Nothing wild or exciting - and I don't mean that I never want to be sad again. But... when I think about the thing I really want, I think a future where I'm happy with the people I care about most is it.
[ She flushes suddenly and laughs, sheepish. ]
Jeez, what an I even saying...
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But she is. She IS honest with him… and he can’t help but smile. A real smile. It’d be nice if his real smile was a tad less on the creepy side, but… ]
Good… yes, good answer.
[ Somehow, some weight leaves his shoulders. Not completely, but… it’s definitely her. There was never any doubt, but… ]
I know it was a little strange to ask that out of the blue, but thank you for answering anyway.
[ His staged smile returns as he takes on the role of a stranger once more. ]
I hope to work with you again someday… preferably on something a little more interesting than a talk show, no?
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